Book Review: 2 (Special Entry for Practicum)

In the name of Allah, Possesser of all Knowledge.

Next week marks the start of my life as a full-time teacher trainee.

Anxious? Yes. Sometimes I feel like I'm feeling too anxious and nervous for this. I even felt physical discomforts - fatigued, felt as if some kind of lump is stuck in my throat, et cetera.

Perhaps because I do not like to be observed. But without observation, how can a supervisor assess his or her teacher trainees, no?

I may not like to be observed but the thoughts of how can a teacher affects the life of his or her students rejuvenates me every time. So I have to believe in myself, forget all worries and remember why I chose teaching as a profession.

This reminds me to write a review on a book I read during holiday, more than a week ago.

-----o-----

Title: Today I Made A Difference - A Collection of Inspirational Stories for America's Top Educators
Author: Various authors (edited by Joseph W. Underwood)
Pages: 212
Publisher: Adams Media

Even experts have times when they are disillusioned with their failures or incompetencies. They will feel so low, downtrodden and unmotivated.

Have you ever feel such feelings before?

When this happens, the best remedy is to rekindle that little spark of passion in your heart - by revisiting your reasons of choice; and your most treasured and unforgettable moments, which have made a difference to your life.

One of the ways is by reading other people's inspirational stories. And this one is a remedy for teachers.

The book Today I Made A Difference is really a good read I would readily recommend to all teachers out there, and to anyone else interested. It compiles stories shared by various authors who are also teachers who received special Disney Teacher Award.

The book is divided into five sections namely Inspirations, Impressions, Instructions, Interruptions and Illuminations which roughly reflect the different aspects of a teacher.

I was most touched when I was reading Jason Kuhlman's The Power of Kindness and Carol Boyer's Yo Soy Maestra (I Am A Teacher). I was a bit emotional while reading Julie Harris's Two Toms, and feeling somewhat romantic when reading Susan Menkes's Making The Cut. I was most inspired when I was reading Brigitte Tennis's Teaching Gems.

The stories compiled in this book covers various different aspects of a teacher's life - why they chose teaching, what keeps them in the profession, and how can they make a difference to their students' life (and sometimes, save the life without them realising it).

This book is specially recommended to all teachers but anyone can read this, I assure you. Because, there must be - at least once - in your life, when you had a teacher who really made a difference in your life -- either through their kind and supportive gestures, or perhaps through their never-ending advices and words of wisdom. This is how a reader can relate the stories in this book with their own lived experience.

As for teachers, these stories can be a reminder and perhaps a motivation to reminds us that teaching profession may be tiring and draining out lives out of our mortal being, but it has the most satisfying reward when we know that our students become successful people and remember us.

-----o-----

And I would like to wish all the best to all Cohort 4 members who will begin their practicum starting next week. Teaching may be harsh and tiring but hang in there, dear friends! The ease will definitely come after difficulties.

"Try to see your practicum as a positive experience, only then you'll be able to enjoy it," so said Mr. Harbinder Singh, my supervisor. :')



"O Allah! Teach me what I do not know, and grant me understanding of your Knowledge and Wisdom. Lift up and away any barrier or veil from my chest so that I can better learn and strive to better myself as a better Muslim everyday."

To Decide Is No Easy

In the name Allah, Most Just.

All through my short life so far, I learnt that making decision is not as difficult.

Because it is part and parcel of all living things given the power to think by their Almighty Creator, Allah 'Azza wa Jalla.

Yes, because we are all humans and we make a lot of subtle and unimportant decisions almost every hour, and a few important and life-changing decisions almost every day.

But making decision is no easy task when it involves other people as well.

Who knows when one becomes unjust in the decision-making?

"O ye who believe! Stand out firmly for Allah, as witnesses to fair dealing, and let not hatred of others to you make you swerve to wrong and depart from justice. Be Just; that is next to Piety, and fear Allah. For Allah is well-acquainted with all that ye do."

[al-Maidah 5:8]

The Holy Quran reminds us not to let our decision be clouded with hatred and wrath as it will divert us from justice. Because vengeance lurks very closely in the depths of hatred and wrath.

But I think, Allah is telling us something even more than what is written in the Scripture. Because with the Holy Quran, there are always meanings need to be read between the lines. Because the speech of God (Kalaamullah) is too beautiful, it has many layers of meaning unfathomable to those who do not think.

I'm not saying I'm wise or anything, but this is my opinion:

The verse above meant to hint us not to make decision or pass on judgement when we are emotional.

By emotional, I do not only mean negative emotions such as ones listed in the verse - hatred and anger and other negative emotions such as jealousy and pride. But I also meant positive emotions: Euphoria for example. Simply because, when one is euphoric one tends to see the world from rose-coloured glasses.

In other words, too strong of emotions can divert us from being just.

The best (I reckon) decision-making should allow some room for benefit of the doubt, lest one cannot foresee what worst consequence one might have to face.

 

To be just is a responsibility

That makes me thinking: Have I been just in my decisions?



"O Allah, the Refuge of those who seek it! Keep me safe from things I'm afraid of, and keep me safe from being unjust in my decisions."

Tagged (Special Entry)

Dengan nama Allah yang Maha Kuasa.

Ketika sedang enak dibuai lagu Kebahagiaan Dalam Perpisahan dendangan Shahir sekejap tadi, hati tetiba terdetik nak buka blog seorang insan merangkap junior-ku. Melihat tajuk entri terbarunya, ada rasa tak kena. 

"Mesti kena tag dengan dia ni," desusku sendirian.

Bila diperiksa, terbukti tekaanku tepat belaka. Ahaha.

Jadi, entri ini ditulis khas untuk tatapan seorang makhluk Allah yang (kononnya :'P) popular dengan nama Airil Azmei atau nama timangannya My First Love (dan nama timangan lain yang bakal dipopularkan kemudian, iaitu Song of My Heart. Ohoho).

But I'm not going to tag anyone, so I'm ignoring rules number 4 and 5. Sesiapa yang berminat nak buat benda alah ni, silakan ye. Tiada paksaan. :')

1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.

4. Tag 10 friends.

5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.

6. Have Fun!

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?

The Goo Goo Dolls - Stay With You

 (p/s: Maksudnya, jangan tanya saja tapi pujuk la sekali. Ahaha)

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?

Rabbani - Satu Qiblat Yang Sama

(p/s: Penting ni, sebagai seorang Muslim yang baik. InsyaAllah)

   WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?

 Rabbani - Ibu Mithali

(p/s: Alhamdulillah, nak bakal isteri yang solehah dan boleh jadi ibu mithali. Ehehe)

 HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?

Rahmat - Penyesalan
 (p/s: Tak ingat pun ada menyesal apa-apa hari ni? Ahaha)

 WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Mirwana - Aku Tanpa CintaMu

 (p/s: Sudah tentu untuk mencari Cinta dan Redha Allah)

WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?

Ramli Sarip & Jay Jay - Senandung Hidup Berbudi
(p/s: Nak pertingkatkan akhlaq Islamiah, insyaAllah)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Exists - Untukmu Ibu

 (p/s: Yang menyayangi ibu agaknya?)

 WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?

  +44 - Baby, Come On

(p/s: Anak emas ibubapa. Ehehe. :'P)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
  Aishah - Syurga Di Telapak Kaki Ibu

(p/s: Semoga ruh mak sentiasa dipelihara dan dikasihi Allah di sana. Ameen)

  WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
  Iklim - Pergimu Satu Tanda

(p/s: Ukhwah fillah abadan abada ye?)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?

The Corrs - All The Love In The World

(p/s: Adakah maksudnya untuk mencari cinta sejati? InsyaAllah da jumpa. Ehehe)

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

Nickelback - If Everyone Cared

(p/s: Iaitu seorang guru yang inspiring, insyaAllah)

 WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

Ramli Sarip - Nyanyian Serambi

(p/s: Mengurat dari serambikah? Ahaha)

  WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?   

M2M - The Day You Went Away

(p/s: Errr . . .)

   WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?

Edcoustic - Aku Ingin MencintaiMu

(p/s: Alhamdulillah~ Nasib baik sesuai. Ehehe)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?

Rabbani - Anak Soleh

(p/s: Tersenyum gembira)

 WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
  Kelly Clarkson - Breakaway

(p/s: Agak la. Tak suka sangat sendirian)

 WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Kumpulan Nasyid Malaysia - Keamanan

(p/s: Mencintai keamanan, bencikan perbalahan dan permusuhan)

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
  Anuar Zain & Elina - Suasana Hari Raya

(p/s: Errr . . . Ramadhan pun belum lagi ni)

  WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? 

Ramli Sarip & Khatijah Ibrahim - Doa Buat Kekasih

(p/s: Kaulah teman, kaulah kekasih. Sweet tak? Ehehe)

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS? 

Akhil Hayy - Kembara Di Tanah Gersang

(p/s: Errr . . . apakah? Ahaha)

Itu saja.

Inilah muka seposen My First Love tersebut. Ahaha~ :'P

Dah puas hati, Airil Azmei? :'P

"Ya Allah! Pabila daku bersahabat, ikhlaskanlah persahabatanku hanya keranaMu. Biarkanlah daku mencintai mereka semata-mata keranaMu. Dan kekalkanlah persahabatan yang terjalin selama-lamanya, hingga ke SyurgaMu."

Lost and Found

In the name of Allah, the Refuge of those who seeking for it.

I'm back.

A whole day and more of contemplating, reading books and the Holy Quran and talking to some people - and dream about some things meaningful to me, have made me realise what was wrong with myself.

I have personal problems, familial problems and some other problems. These weakened my mental strength and my spirit.

But others might experienced even worse situations. And more importantly, I have experienced more arduous situations than this. Perhaps these were some new situations and I didn't know how to react.

And here was my problem - what was wrong with me: My Imaan was hollowed out. Yes, my soul was weary and exhausted. My heart was cloudy.

You know when that happens. Really, you'll know.

From Abu Hurayrah, the Prophet (pbuh) said: "Keep renewing your Imaan." The companions asked, "O Allah's Prophet! How should we renew our Imaan?"

The Prophet replied, "Recite Laa Ilaaha Illallah often."

[Narrated by Imam Ahmad]

The Prophet (pbuh) said, "Each heart has its own passing cloud, just as the moon when it is shining and there comes a cloud that replaces its brightness with darkness. Whenever it (the cloud) moves on, it (the moon) will shine yet again."

[Abu Nu`am & As-Silsilah As-Sahihah]

From the explanation of our Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) in the hadiths above, we know that our Imaan will expire if we don't try maintain and renew it often. As another hadith (narrated by at-Tabrani and al-Hakim) explained that Imaan in our heart will be worn out just the way clothes are worn out, or become thin due to usage. All these happen whenever we sin and commit wrongdoings whether we realise it or not.

I realised this when I sat quietly when finishing my regular Quran recital after Maghrib prayer last night. There were zikirs played on Astro Oasis channel while waiting for azan of Isyak prayer. I was immersed in the zikirs as I followed the recital silently, then I found one of them really moved my heart. I'm not sure what it is called but I call it Istighfar Taubat Nasuha.

When your heart is tainted with black dots you don't realise are there, repentance (taubat) is the best remedy.

I downloaded one mp3 of this Istighfar [click here to download] and listened to it throughout the night while sleeping. I found my pillow soaked with tears. There and then I realised how my soul has been longing to feel again the wonder when I passed through the "liminality threshold" some times ago when I first figured out myself how gracious is Allah the Almighty.

Don't let sin taints the heart as it drives us away from Allah

I believe, every soul longs to see its Creator.

That's why the heart rumbles when we sin because the soul cries out of fright and awe to the Almighty Creator but the self never tried to listen to it.



"Forgive me, O Allah, The Forgiver! Forgive me, O Allah, away from sins. Forgive me, O Allah, The Forgiver! Forgive me, O Allah, away from sins."

Break

In the name of Allah who does not sleep.

A lot of things happened lately.

A lot things which made me sit quietly by myself and think - no, more like contemplating on few things about myself:

My attitude.
My language.

My media use.
My connectedness with people around me.

Have I been just?


"To satisfy humans is infinity," so said a teacher I respected back in school.

But I have people whom I want to satisfy, whom I want to listen to their advices and whom I want to share things with. But I really should know my limit - the very least, the limit I should be abiding so as to be just to others as well.

And for that, I'll be taking a break to think things through.

I have temporarily deactivated my Facebook account.
I may not be updating this blog for awhile.
I may not check my e-mail as often.

Thank you for putting up with me all this while. I'll see you again when I see you - which I don't know how soon.


Yours truly,
Hafizuddin Yahaya @ Chouji.



"O Allah! Guide me onto the Right Path and please keep me away from sins."